the hard and soft of it

I love Fall. And it occurred to me today that the loveliest (in my opinion) time of year is when all the leaves are dying.

My mom sent me some transcribed stories from my great, great grandmother, Edna May. Edna recalls from the year 1918 -

"When mother died, the snow was about five feet high all over, and they came and plowed it out around the front of the house and brought in church benches and left the casket in the front room and had the funeral out in the front yard. It's funny what you remember about things, but one of the things I remember about Mother's death is responsibility. I was only ten years old, and about the day after Mother died I remember Dad went out and killed some chickens, and then he came in and said he didn't know if he'd have time to clean them. I piped up and said I didn't know but I'd try to clean those chickens. One of the first things they used to do after there'd been a death was to cook something - a batch of cookies, or a chicken, or just something to try to get a good smell in the house."

Last night we took some cookies over to Nate's uncle's house. His wife has had cancer for almost a year and isn't doing so well lately. I hadn't yet met her, and it's an understatement to say I was nervous. On the way there, I think I told Nate at least three times variations of the following: "We're keeping this short. We'll just say you have reading to do." But when we were greeted at the door by Nate's uncle, I was relieved to find that the general mood was actually quite warm and peaceful. A burning candle made the room smell of Christmas. Nate's aunt was seated on the sofa, and I didn't realize it was her until Nate hugged her. This woman looked healthy, and she was bubbly...not what I had expected.

I don't know... Life and death are hard subjects. "Funny details" keep things soft.

Nate's home. I'm gonna go give him a big hug.

(Sorry about the contemplative mood I'm in... I'll post about something silly next time.)