you know how you get on kicks? i've been listening to a lot of "great lake swimmers" lately, and when i'm not doing that i'm watching 30 rock online. these two thought-hijackers consume me lately, and i have succumbed to them whole-heartedly.
i am also consumed by food. shouldn't it be the other way around? i should consume the food and decide when i want to do it. no, my friends. the holiday season started me on another kick - eating.
here's a song my dad wrote for me when i was a young sprout (i even think of myself in terms of food):
emilie is in the middle
she's not big and she's not little
emilie's just right
and she smiles so bright
i like to hold her tight
in my arms at night
because she's emilie
well, nobody can wrap their arms around my waist at the moment... except gumby. is gumby single? he may not be real, but he's my favorite color. i can settle for that.
another song.
mares eat oats and does eat oats
and little lambs eat ivy
a kid'll eat ivy too
wouldn't you?
yes. i am a kid with kicks and an insatiable appetite. in the words of jenna from 30 rock, "me want food!" if this continues, i will never swim in great lakes again... because i will always be within 20 minutes of having eaten something.
this is a cry for help. don't feed me. don't talk about food around me. don't eat in front of me. don't eat at all. show me your skinny selves. slap me with your bird-boned hands. remind me that tying my own shoes is a wonderful thing and that i won't always have to rock to get up off the sofa.
i have no idea what i'm talking about now. this post was doing alright until i started going off like jack did when he tried to help tracy overcome his negative feelings towards his dad. he lost control; he started role playing and doing all the voices of multiple characters. but tracy was cured!
maybe one of you can role play and do voices for me until i overcome my desire to eat. any takers?
4 comments:
I wish I could help, but I'm in the same fix! Let me know if you find the cure.
the cure is poorness. i just got back home and my cupboards are bare. You can't eat it if you can't buy it. so start saving all your food money for travels with me. Also. I notice you're going through a hard time Em, that sucks and I'm sorry, but it does wonders for your writing.
p.s. my word verification word is Lardbarr. no lie.
emilie, I FREAKING LOVE YOU!!! i literally was cracking up out loud as i read this. you just have a way of saying things that makes me laugh. come hang out with me this week! quinn left for cali this weekend, so we can have slumber parties whenver you want! love you. i'll call you soon if you don't call me first.
high times, hard times... sometimes there's nothing to eat, but i always land on my feet! nah, missie. i'm not having a hard time. i'm having a funny time.
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